Jokes!

Thought that we could have a bit of fun by posting some of the better jokes that we come across..
Here's my first one..



Why u should never argue with a child.


A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a
whale to swallow a human because even though it was
a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could
not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied," Then you ask him".
__________________________________________

The children had all been photographed, and the
teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a
copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will
be to look at it when you are all grown up and
say,' There's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'that's
Michael. He's a doctor.'"
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And
there's the teacher. She's dead."
__________________________________________
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of
the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she
said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood,
as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in
the ordinary positions the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Because your feet aren't empty."
__________________________________________

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a
Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of
the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other
end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip
cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all You
want. God is watching the apples!"

Cheers!